Wordless Wednesday

Deepening

My brain has been weighed down with heavy thoughts this week. There are so many things going on around me that affect me deeply but which I cannot control in any way. Jobs and their functions are changing, my roles is changing, relationships are changing, some in ways that have broken my heart...I made the comment to a friend this week that I am ready, excited even, for change, but when I am in the middle of it, I often struggle none the less. 

But blessed are those who trust in the LORD and have made the LORD their hope and confidence.

       They are like trees planted along a riverbank, with roots that reach deep into the water. Such trees are not bothered by the heat or worried by long months of drought. Their leaves stay green, and they go right on producing delicious fruit.  Jeremiah 17:7-8

We are coming up on May...a good month, a miraculous month, a perfecting year I'm excited. Still.

Called to Community

"Christianity would be easier if I could do it in a cave...alone" is a phrase that leaves my mouth often, and I mean it. I really do. Loving God is so easy, loving people, interacting with people, showing fruit over flesh with people day after day after day is. so. not. easy. At least, it isn't for me. I struggle with words, attitudes and irritations and that's before anyone even gets close to me. However, having spent considerable time studying what the Bible says about Christians in community, I know for certain two things: we are absolutely called to live, work and worship together as a community of believers both locally and as part of the world-wide church body; and we are called to this for purposes of encouragement, edification, support and accountability.
It doesn't take an in-depth study of scripture to determine that as a holy people, we suck. In my opinion people misunderstand exactly the depth of our depravity. We've relegated sin into a list of "do not do's" but it's so much deeper than that. Paul tells us in Romans that the depth of sin in us is far beyond what we do and don't do, sin nature is part of our very being. It is in our marrow and DNA. We do not just do sin; we are sinners. We may try to will it out of ourselves but we cannot. This is why we need Jesus.

 Yet it doesn't stop just at Jesus. Yes, He is the answer to the sin problem, but that is only the beginning of our response to Him, because as much as I would like it to, the sin problem doesn't just go away. It is an on-going issue within us as we begin the process of rooting out the source of our sin issues (and we all have sin issues).  As much as God works in us to transform us from the inside out, He gave us something more to refine us. He gave us each other. The community of Christ is meant to be a tool not only as the hands and feet of Christ to the world, but for the betterment of each other through shared lives, shared work, shared struggles  and shared encouragement.

This does not mean that need to let all 1,600 members of my home church in on all my business all the time. It does mean that I have gathered around myself a few groups of people who know me and in spite of that, love me; whose counsel and advice I trust and cherish and most importantly; who love the Lord and want for all of us to be more like Him. It is these people that I can trust to honestly evaluate my words and my behaviors as Christ's ambassador. It is these people that I can trust to hold me up with Truth and not stroke my ears with pretty words. It is these people who sharpen me as I strive to live in community with people who are sometimes very unlike me.

We spend a great deal of time  focusing on the fluffy, friendly part of our Christian relationships and while we do so, we rob ourselves of one of our most valuable earthly assets.  Accountability among believers is not always comfortable, easy or fun, but it is certainly one of the most loving things we can do for each other. Building a person up doesn't merely consist of words that puff up and make us feel good. It includes cutting out the weaker parts so that the entire structure is more sound. It is sometimes painful, heartbreaking, backbreaking work. Who better to entrust it to than those whose hearts are grafted with our own into the heart of the Giver of Life?

Investing

How will I live my life today? What will I do with my time? I've spent many hours since returning from the mission trip thinking about how and why and where I invest myself: my time, my energy, my love, my emotions, my joy from day to day. I may serve an infinite God but I am ever more impressed with the idea that my time here is finite, miniscule even in the scheme of eternity. It is my responsibility to wisely determine day by day, where my energy is best invested.
Lately, I have been squandering some of that time and energy on things and people who either aren't interested in the investment, aren't best use of my time and energy or simply aren't what God would have me invest in at this time. I want to say that I find these items easy to put down and walk away, but some things are harder than they appear, and emotional entanglements aren't easily set right. No wonder we are warned to guard our hearts.

It's time to determine where and with whom my energy, my prayers and my investments are most wisely spent and stop wasting precious commodities on empty investments.

Awareness

If you have listened to me talk at all in the last nine months, you will know that I have fallen completely and irrevocably in love with Arizona. Visiting twice in the last month certainly doesn't quench that feeling. Each time we visit I am literally awestruck at what God has wrought.  Everything, everything around me is so different from what my eyes and my body are used to that it is necessary to adjust my very basic levels of awareness. There are dangers for which I am not normally wary, and beauty hidden in places I would not normally look.

However, what I love most about being in Arizona is the focus I have when I am there. There are no distractions. I know my purpose and my goal. I am able to move steadily and unerringly towards it without distractions or emotional entanglements. Each day I wake up motivated and eager; and each night I fall asleep exhausted and accomplished. My God feels very near.

When I return home, the reality of a thousand tasks and responsibilities, distractions and interactions rains down often even before I have time to draw breath. What I desire is to find even a fraction of the simplicity of focus and ability to achieve that I find out on the mission field. To know each day what tasks will move me toward a goal and to see those tasks through to completion. This is also my mission field. Lord, give me clarity of vision, please.